Am I a Geek If I can't Even Geek-Up My Printer?

Well, I survived my week of hellish stress, only to be brought to my knees by some piece of plastic and ink, namely, my printer.  I've got this amazingly modern printer, designed to print the most amazing pictures, but for the life of me, I can't make it work.  I wonder if I could find a Printer for Dummies somewhere?  

I should have been born in the 18th century, or whenever it was that electricity was a novelty.  I can't even change my bulblight (but to be fair, it's not technological limits...more of a... height limit), going shopping for a new computer gives me the chills and ... I have no idea how I'm gonna handle my new Iphone.  My dad was all happy to offer me one (probably because he'll get my ipod) but honestly... unless there is the app 'iphone for dummies' I'm sure the wonders of the Apple phone will be lost on me.  I'd like to be technology-savvy but... whenever God handed that particular talent, I was probably in line for the clumsiness gene. 

As for the computer... My ibook is now five years old, which in computer years is about a gazillion years old. At least, that's what I've learned from my friends, who can't help but wonder how it is that my mac is still up and running.  I even have a friend who "offered" to throw it out the window so I could get a new one.

So beware, Apple sale assistants.  I'm coming and chances are, you will be earning your salary today.